Umbrella Reading
by Tokimeki
Summary: Duo thinks he can tell what a person is like by the kind of umbrella they use. Stupid, short, crazy, fluffy, pointless, plotless, and many other flaws make this fic worth reading (please?)! 1x2, 3x4, NoinxZechs, Relena-bashing.


Umbrella Reading  
  
By: Tamayo  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing, I never said I did. Moron.  
  
Warnings: 1x2, 3x4, Relena-bashing, my usual stuff. Oh yeah I have to mention that if you people are wondering what 1x2 is or why in my other fics I never put any little yaoi warnings, it's because when I read my first yaoi fanfic and became addicted, the fic didn't have a warning on it. If it did I may not have read it and I wouldn't be a yaoi fangirl today! So I just leave it be.  
  
Authour's Note: Um yayful fluffiness. Very very stupid fic.  
  
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It was a horrible, stupid, cold, rainy day. And Duo was perfectly cheerful to be sloshing through the puddles and splashing the other pilots, who were the only people for miles who were under umbrellas and somehow, still soaking wet.  
  
Our favorite five, the gundam boys, were walking down the street in (PUTARANDOMNAMEHERE) city. Everyone passing by were carrying umbrellas as well, and looking amusedly at a soaked Heero, who walked closest to Duo.  
  
Eventually, the downpour became too much so the three friends went to sit down in a café. Duo insisted they sat at a window seat so he could watch the people who passed by.  
  
As they sat down, the first thing anyone said was "Why do you wanna watch the passers-by, Duo?". And it was asked by Quatre.  
  
Duo smiled cheerfully. "Because I like to get to know them," replied the American pilot.  
  
"Uhhh how the hell do you do that Duo?" asked Quatre confusedly. The others happily sip-sipped away at the tea(?) Quatre had bought them, for they had given up on Duo as a lost cause loooong ago.  
  
"Oh, I read their umbrellas!" Duo said cheerfully.  
  
This reply had crazy effect: Heero spat out his tea, Wufei snorted into his, Trowa (OMG) blinked (OMGOMGOMG!!!), and Quatre fell out of his chair.  
  
"You what?" asked Quatre after getting back up. Duo smiled and repeated himself.  
  
"How do you do that, baka?" growled Heero. Wufei was too amused for words. Duo didn't seem to notice Heero's question, but he did purposely dump all his hot tea into Wufei's lap. Wufei jumped up, screaming, and stumbled off to the washrooms.  
  
"Oh its really simple. You can tell what kind of person someone is by the kind of umbrellas they carry!" explained Duo after Wufei disappeared. Heero, Quatre, and silent Trowa sweatdropped in unison.  
  
"No, really!" said Duo, seeing their skeptic glances. He pointed out the window where a man and a woman were walking by, holding matching couples umbrellas (1). They actually turned out to be Noin and Zechs (O_o;;).  
  
"SEE?!? LOOK!!! THEY'RE A PERFECT MATCH AND SO ARE THEIR UMBRELLAS!" screeched Duo. Half of the café (who had been listening in after the Wuffie display) dissolved into laughter. Duo pouted.  
  
"NO! ITS TRUE!" wailed he. Suddenly he spotted Dorothy Catalonia walked by, and her umbrella depicted a scene of gory war, which would make any normal person throw up (AKA: Dorothy's idea of 'beautiful war').  
  
"SEEEEEEEEEEEEE?!?!?!?!? THERE'S MORE PROOF!" Duo exclaimed angrily.  
  
"Yeah, that Dorothy is a basket case!" snorted Heero. Both statements were greeted with laughter of the whole diner. Poor Duo looked very very sad and pitiful that no one believed him. Heero saw this and felt a twinge of guilt that he was making his lover feel bad. He patted Duo on the back and said, "Duo, its ok, we believe you."  
  
Duo glared, and pointed again. Relena was walking by with a fluffy pink umbrella. Heero cowered under the table as Relena waved to Duo, and Duo grimaced in return.  
  
Quatre blinked. Duo was beginning to seem right. And didn't all his boring no-life employees who dressed in black all day carry equally boring no-life all black plain umbrellas?  
  
Heero blinked. Duo had a point. Everything that was pink was evil. Wait a minute, is that what Duo said? Wondered Heero. Then he decided it didn't matter because pink was congrugent of evil.  
  
Trowa blinked. Quatre was bending over to help Heero out from under the table. Damn, Trowa thought, my lover has a cute ass.  
  
Wufei returned shortly and discovered the topic of conversation had changed to hentai subjects and upon hearing them discussing them, he passed out and that is all there is to this story. The scary end.  
  
A/N: No freakin' comment.  
  
(1) Ive seen these before O_O!!! 


End file.
